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+{ jsJquery, cssNormalize, cssMain, id_txt, cv_pdf }:
+''
+<!DOCTYPE html>
+<html>
+  <head>
+    <meta charset="utf-8">
+    <meta http-equiv="X-UA-Compatible" content="IE=edge">
+    <title>Profpatsch’s Lair</title>
+    <meta name="description" content="Oh the things you’ll see …">
+    <meta name="viewport" content="width=device-width, initial-scale=1">
+
+    <link rel="stylesheet" href="${cssNormalize}">
+    <link rel="stylesheet" href="${cssMain}">
+
+    <script src="${jsJquery}"></script>
+  </head>
+  <body>
+
+    <header id="title">
+      <h1>Profpatsch</h1>
+      <h2>
+        <script>
+         talkies = [
+             { talk: "Oh the things you’ll see …" },
+             { talk: "I’ll manage." },
+             { talk: "Spurdo Spärde sprölölö",
+               hover: "bydon xDDDD" },
+             { talk: "Where is Jessica Hyde?" },
+             { talk: "Wie talkst du eigentlich?",
+               hover: "Du Splasher" },
+             { talk: "See you Space Cowboy",
+               hover: "bang",
+               link: "https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=juxjTAqB9Fs" },
+             { talk: "STACKENBLOCKEN",
+               hover: "21:45",
+               link: "https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d6wd78jMHDk" },
+             { talk: "Don’t lose your waaaaaaay",
+               hover: "I haven’t actually seen KlK …" },
+             { talk: "STOP RIGHT THERE CRIMINAL SCUM",
+               hover: "Let me tell you a story about my past …" },
+             { talk: "Ich zähl bis zehn und mach die Augen wieder auf",
+               hover: "Rivo Drei – Von Vorne" },
+             { talk: "It’s so ironic when your makeup runs",
+               hover: "blackest_eyes& trains& sound_of_muzak& prodigal" },
+             { talk: "It’s time now, my time now. Give me my, give me my wings",
+               hover: "Should you see your Maker’s face tonight // Look ’em in the eye, look ’em in the eye // And tell ’em // Never lived a lie, never took a life // But surely saved one // Hallelluja // It’s time for you to bring me home",
+               link: "https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Ajx-ABtbVM"
+             },
+             { talk: "{-# LANGUAGE ImplicitProtolude #-}" },
+             { talk: "overfull hbox" }
+         ];
+         var talkie = talkies[Math.floor(Math.random()*talkies.length)];
+         var elem = null;
+         var title = "";
+         if (talkie.hasOwnProperty("hover")) { title = 'title="'+talkie.hover+'"'; }
+         if (talkie.hasOwnProperty("link")) {
+             elem = function(content, attrs) {
+                 return '<a href="'+talkie.link+'" '+attrs+' >'+content+'</a>';
+             };
+         } else {
+             elem = function(content, attrs) {
+                 return '<span '+attrs+'>'+content+'</span>';
+             };
+         }
+         $('#title h2').append(elem(talkie.talk, title));
+        </script>
+        <noscript>
+          Oh the things you’ll see …
+        </noscript>
+      </h2>
+      <hr />
+    </header>
+
+    <main>
+      <p id="codeblock">
+        <a href="${id_txt}">id.txt</a><br>
+        <a href="${cv_pdf}">CV</a>
+      </p>
+
+      <p>Hey there. Seems like you landed on my webpage.</p>
+
+      <p>Well, more like a simple HTML page. But that’s fine for the moment, since I don’t use it as a web presence yet.
+        I may when I finally write those articles I have in mind, but for now you are stuck with this.</p>
+
+      <p>That’s not a problem, though, since other people do a lot better job at designing these. For example the folks at Youtube, StackExchange or Github.</p>
+
+      <p>If you are searching for a skilled programmer to do some work for you, <a href="${cv_pdf}">look no further</a>.
+        In case you want to know what I do in my free time, you can <a href="https://twitter.com/Profpatsch/">follow me on Twitter</a>.</p>
+      <p>On another note, you can find me practically everywhere under my nick (Github, G+, several mailinglists, SO, &amp;c.)
+
+      <p>There you go. Cya!</p>
+    </main>
+  </body>
+</html>
+''